I can be my own best friend

"Your" is NOT equal to "you're."
Know your "there/their/they're" before you use it.
A lot. Alot is what special people say when their pee sticks feel good.
Weird. I don't understand how you fucked that one up, but it IS NOT wierd.
Apostrophes are important. It is = it's. "Its" is possessive and will fuck you up if you cheat on it.
Capitalization is the difference between "helping your Uncle Jack off a horse," and "helping your uncle jack off a horse." -.-
"I love you" is not something you use to get someone to like you even more. It is a tool to trick someone into giving you a blow job. I disagree with this, still.
Moving is an illusion. And a paradox.
Paradoxes rely on your frame of reference. So does your life span, because you all are dead to me.
The period belongs INSIDE the quotation mark. Example: "Hi."
I is less than three you. I want to make this especially clear. < is not less than, it's IS less than. If you don't know that, you're a fucking retard. I'm not your friend.
You could argue that I'm the idiot here, but you would lose that argument.
You can't insult me if I'm not insulted. Try as hard as you feel the need to, and you will still fail.
To and too are two VERY different words. Too is akin to also. To is not. And two is a number.
Animals are FOOD not friends. All vegetarians suck. The only good thing about a vegetarian is more meat for me. Other than that, they could get molested by trains for all the fucks I don't give.
Life is one giant failure. You will always fail. If you ever succeed, you failed at failing.
Than and then are not part of the swingers club. One can not be used in place of the other.
And if you give more than zero fucks, fuck off.

The love I sell you in the evening by the morning won't exist.

Lately, there's been this one girl in my head, which is a good thing. That is, it is under normal circumstances. However, currently, this isn't a normal circumstance. It's beginning to get to me. I'm handling it, but the closer winter gets, the more I dream of melancholic days. There's this on some, by Bright Eyes, that I can't get out of my head, and I personally feel like it has one of the most powerful lyrics found in a song concerning "love." I'll let you decided, really.

"... I know you have a heavy heart, I can feel it when we kiss. So many men, stronger than me, have thrown their backs out, trying to lift, it. But me I'm not a gamble, you can count on me to split, the love I sell you in the evening by the morning won't exist."

It honestly just speaks to me. I wasn't always like this, but sometimes I feel like I'm becoming this hollowed out guy who truely can love someone for a night, and disappear by the morning.

Her mouth is poison and wine.

I'm not sure you can comprehend what I would do for that girl, but it's pretty sick. I really am truely in love with her, and it's proving difficult to remove her presence from my thoughts. I really do like thaat girl. She's a wonderful girl, one of the best I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. If I knew that our time together would end so abruptly, I would have cherished every mili-second instead of the plain seconds. I never felt so strongly for someone. Ever. All the people I've known, all the people I've met, they mean nothing without her. I still have her letters, and I still read them through, and I still fall in love with her again, and again, every time, without fail. I found the person I wanted to marry, but she didn't find me. I wish I could see her one last time, but this is how my life will end. Without her. I'll get over her. Eventully. But it sure will be difficult. That's for sure.

Google Calendar & co.

I never realised how important it is to stay organised. I mean to say, I've always understood why, I just never noticed how crucial it is to everyday life. That's when I learned about Google Calendar. It does this neat trick called cloud sync, which means, if I enter something into my personal calendar with my Google account, it's automatically synced up with every calendar I have on every electronic device I have with Google Calender. Not to mention that I can access it offline. It's essential to optimise your time schedule so you can maximize your effectiveness to enjoy your pre-planned day to it's fullest. Pretty neat, huh?

Some people like to casually mention I may be obsessed with Google, but they're completely wrong. I enjoy cloud computing. There's only one company I can trust to be consistent with that, and you already know who that is. I mean, have you ever tried to Google something and been redirected because the servers were down? Of course not! This is Google, not Bing.

There's also the OS consistency I enjoy. I am a huge fan of Linux (fuck you, I have Wine) and it's nice to do advanced programming on the go. Not to mention an amazing start up and resume time! I mean, when I'm in an situation that requires urgency, I cannot afford to waste more than eight seconds for start up time.
And as always, I have to make you smile. I'll share a story and save the anecdotes for the smart people for a later post.

Yesterday was my oldest brothers birthday, he is an old fart. Finally twenty-four, not that he knows it (yet). I called him up to wish him a happy birthday, and he amused me with this wonderful story about Mushroom Wars (PS3 Downloadable Video Game).
"Anthony, do you play Mushroom wars?"
"Yeah."
"Well whenever you feel like getting your ass kicked,you have to play against me. I'm so good. Nobody can beat me. Not even Chala! I'm so good you'll say I should have been an accountant, wondering where the fuck I get all these numbers from. I just beat Joey and Chala. Twice. In a row. They can't fuck with me, once I start getting the numbers going you'll be like 'oh fuck what the fuck did you do?' And then I'll win."
I laughed at this.

Finally, we are looking for an editor. Send me an email if you're interested. Understand that I use English spellings and Charles is always tired when he writes. I'll respond with an application to your email, or, if I know you know your stuff, I'll just welcome you to the team.
Farewell for now,
A.M.A.

A good friend of mine told me ...

... now that I have your attention....

dude, you need to work on your coping skills.... take a deep breath, put a day aside (Monday is a holiday, try then....), straighten out your shit (develop protocols... it's a life-long process...).

a significant percent of life is organizing...

clear the decks then get to the important stuff... and get enough sleep.... don't get up on Sunday.... or get up at noon, shit, eat, scratch your balls, take a nap from 1PM to 5PM... repeat as necessary...

talk with a professor... or all of them... take walks.... take a break from all that electronic crap.... eat, scratch your balls, take a nap from 1PM to 5PM... repeat as necessary...

fucking relax.... eat, scratch your balls, take a nap from 1PM to 5PM... repeat as necessary...

listen to some classical music, smoke something, find some girl who'll let you snigg between her legs.... with out further obligation... eat something you like.... scratch your balls, take a nap from 1PM to 5PM... repeat as necessary...

... stay in touch.... if you need someone to tell you to go fuck yourself, I'm your guy...

------
I didn't write this, just a email I received from my friend. Really good advice ... for guys.

I'm tired as fuck.

My school fails so hard, they sync everything up on they're private servers. And I use that word loosely, because nothing syncs, it has to be manually updated. Then they sync with Microsoft. FUCK MICROSOFT. I have to manually sync up my Google Calendar now. I'm also tired as fuck. And then I have to figure out how to push my UML email notifications to my phone. The credit union I joined doesn't have an app yet, but they're (barely) working on it. The name is awesome (Jeanne D'Arc) and it's got a pretty debit card. Did I mention I'm tired as fuck? Dealing with half commuting isn't that bad, and my roommate is pretty cool, but the one thing that's keeping me calm (other than the awesome 4G and country/folk radio) is the fact that I can visit Emily Kocot and Patricia Caliento when they finally decide to show up at their respective schools whenever the fuck I want. I'm gonna be the greatest annoyance EVER! And I'm tired as fuck!

P.S. Get to school!

Yoshimi Battles The Evil Pink Robots

To be honest

I (not so) secretly wish that you're only doing this to make me get over you.

 That maybe there's something

  I could possibly do

That could put you back in my arms.

  There always was before.

  I figured it out then.

  Maybe I could do it again.

  Fix my mistakes.

  End my fuck ups.

To look into the eyes of the woman I love

  And have her look into mine

  And have something be mutual.